In the last 17 months, I have made an astonishing discovery, an amazing discovery, an incredible, earth shaking discovery. Brace yourselves…Boys are different than girls. Obviously, having been married for 15+ years, I was already aware of this on a certain level, but it wasn’t until my son was born that I discovered how fundamentally different they are from birth.
He hurtles his way through life. From zooming down 2 flights of stairs on his belly in just a few seconds to joyfully splashing in the toilet (gross!), he is a whirlwind of activity. It seems like he only walked for a week, than he began running everywhere. He dances to anything, even the sound of the dishwasher or the click of the blinker. He joins in on laughter around him, even if he has no idea what the laughter is about or even who the people are. Everything is louder, more exciting, more earth shattering. We were used to a daughter who had one tantrum in public ever. We were introduced to a son who feels free to have tantrums wherever and whenever the fancy strikes him. After he realizes that we are not going to give in, the tantrum quickly subsides and he is back to his sunny little self.
Even the way he interacts with his toys is different. He will hug a stuffed animal, only to hurtle it across the room moments later. Everything is a possible climbing tool, from a toy parking garage to a book to someone’s foot.
We enjoy watching him learn each day. He learns funny and strange things like ‘I shouldn’t try to go down the stairs on my belly while naked’ to ‘I can eat with my eyes shut’. Painful things like ‘Dancing on chairs is a hazardous activity’ and ‘Hitting my head on the wall on purpose can hurt’. Practical things like ‘Books only open one way’ and ‘I can take my socks off anytime I want’.
He copies most noises. He specializes in trying to recreate bodily noises, though. If anyone dares to audibly pass gas in his presence, they will be treated to a verbal reenactment. The same goes for burping. I’m sure we could break this habit if we weren’t so busy giggling. I am preparing myself for the first time this happens in public. I will avoid eye contact, look busy, whistle a tune, anything to avoid the fact that my child is copying a stranger’s burp and laughing hysterically at himself. My one consolation is that he hasn’t figured out how to purposely burp yet.
This morning my daughter said she was so glad she had a brother. She added that life would be so boring during the day without him. I wanted to come back with a smart remark like “What am I? Chopped liver?” Instead, I thought about it for a moment and had to agree with her. He has added a depth to our lives that we were unaware existed. I get the privilege of seeing my daughter as a sibling, not just as an only child. She is fiercely loyal and protective of her brother even as she herself occasionally puts him in dangerous situations. The look on her face the first time she met her brother was indescribable. I had never seen her look so ecstatic and she still expresses this excitement almost every day.
To wrap this up, just remember one thing: “Boys are different than girls.” The next time you see a group of teenage boys acting like monkeys to impress a group of girls, or see a couple of boys playfully wrestling with each other, or if you just happen to be the victim of my son’s unfortunate bodily noise problem (I promise we’ll work on it, just as soon as we stop laughing), remember this: “Boys are space aliens different than girls.”
Rock of Sages 